Finding a Life Partner

Are you the potential guy? attractive guy? talkative guy? or my cup of tea?
I want to find a person who has similar interest with me.

How many out there are willing to do the same things as me?

My dream is to travel and explore the culture outside. Some adventure is not bad. Trying out some extraordinary activities (not paranormal!) such as hiking, camping, jungle trekking maybe flying fox ( I haven't try before). From my budget trip, Pattaya, I love flying with parachute with speed boat although it was a short distance flying in the sky, it was totally exciting! Memorable! I do not dare to experience on my own but if there is someone who accompany me or take a lead I will join in! This must be one of the life experience and you don't want to miss it! On the other hand, I actually don't like much social networking so you can see I prefer to make call rather than messages because most of the time they will sometimes misunderstand what I wrote in the message (=.=) that why I like face to face social rather than social networking. I'm trying to improve mother tough and other languages as well. Honestly I'm bad in making friends and social around. I will try to improve that.

I will try my best to fit in your world and try to experiences what you are experiencing,

But will you do the same to me?

Do you feel the same as me?

This is mostly happens on your first love.
Later, certain time or after your first one, you will not feel the same way as before.
A feeling to describe as sparkle.
As a touch on each other, skin to skin or lip to lip, you feel nervous, extra heart beats and some excitement.
I kinda admit! I do enjoyed it! and has been searching for it after my first love.
To feel falling in love again... I guess!
I thought every guy that successful to attract  a girls' attention may give the same result of these feel but I'm wrong maybe Yes for the beginning stage but it only lasted for less than a week then later it eventually got bored. (This is my so-called test drive) and this is why and one of the reason my x changes for less than a month.

Some question being asked to some of my friends
"Why he/she is the chosen one?"
"Why do you like him/her?"
"Which part of him/her that attracts you?"
Their feedback was THE FEEL! (Isn't it mysterious!)

They told me that when the feel of like towards love,

1. You will misses him all the time (I do but don't know how the guys feel)
2. Whatever topic can be talk (I don't think so, there will be some topic is filtered)
3. You will willing to scarify for him. (Maybe and depends on what)
4. Always give support (It is important for motivation and I need it very much)
5. Whenever you face difficulties, it will just disappear when you saw your love ones.(This is two guys told me before. It seems like I'm their calmer)

Is above statement true? For me it is almost 80% true.

There is one guy I met in somewhere, he always give me encouragement and comfort me when I'm nervous (I easily get nervous all the time and he knows me very well). He is my calmer. Whenever he is around, I feel safe & secure and able to be comfortable & being myself all the time in front of him. He the one who give me sparkle even we know each other for a certain time but until now each time an accidentally touches, the feel appears and I don't why. (I don't understand why we that doesn't work out?)
I am definitely misses him so much!

There is another guy also my dearest but so far I just can rate him "good" not excellence. He did everything like the first guy but just the feel was lesser. As I mention before, the sparkle does lasted that long or maybe... but somehow I feel lucky to have him around me. Thank you. Keeping in progress!

How to know that person really suit you?

Hey Bloggie,

Currently I'm very depressing and very unstable emotion...
I'm very confusing on what I want!
No one could understand and could talk too...
All I know the surrounding people will just give me comfort and just says "don't think so much"
I want advise, interpreting, analysis. (although, not even 50% I will follow, I just want a feedback on my current issue) Maybe I go to the wrong person who never had a relationship before or they are having such a loving life...

I really want relationship, who always have someone care about me, try to understand me, pampered me, calm me down, accompany me up and always there for me...
In a month or two my relationship always ended up with full stop.
I always having a short term relationship but I enjoyed most of the relationship (thanks all for creating memories together)
After a few weeks in a relationship, I will reconsider other factor on him (the requirement) such as:

1. Does him hardworking?
2. How high is his education level?
3. Can he afford my expenses?
4. Can I accept all his principle and bad attitudes?
5. Does he really loves me? (just for confirm that he never regrets to accept me!)

This is what normally in my mind for now!

Most of the time I'm being scared.
Someone treating me too good or I have been forgotten (by not finding me more than 2 days)
When someone is treating me too good, I'm afraid the next moment in a minute or two all had gone and nightmare is coming. Next, my mind will automatically think a lot of assumption or if things. (So guys always let your girl know where is her position and let her know how important is she for you although it is annoying, it is the best way for your girl to stop thinking a lot)
When I'm scare, I will start to let go so no one will be hurt as our relationship is just started.
Maybe in the short period it is hurt but it must be end.
I'm a very selfish girl and this is my self protection for not getting hurt.
That is the reason each time I end my what so ever "ship" (friend or relation)

Recently I'm feeling bad bad bad...
I feel like I'm the destroyer.
Although is our relationship is over or temporary over (confuse), I'm still feel bad deep inside me.
I have many WHY question in my head to ask but I do not dare to ask...
What happening over there? You never want to give me a proper answer.
Just let me guessing and guessing over here. Endless...
Feeling breathless. I try to not think about it but I couldn't.
Wish to end this up as soon as possible.

Exercise

Darn!
I really need to start my exercise!
Actually I love sports very much
But I don't do it alone
I would prefer someone accompany me to do exercise or some sport activities...
It's fun though!
Not really can have a group activities and get to know each others more...
I really loves it!
Although I'm shy at the beginning, I would like someone to lead me and encourage me.
So that I wouldn't be shy to let others know I'm bad with it...
But even though I don't know how to play, I would like to start with a try!
Never Try, Never Know!

Now and always my little boy

Some words from him ...
I hold her hand because I need to let her know I can be trusted and I will bring her more happiness.
I hug her because I wan to let her know how warm to her from my side.
I kisses her because I want to let her know and pass my love to her. 

Girls, look at those words!
Do you feel the heart melts??
This is one of guy I met
But he is currently unavailable.
Hard to explains those things (just ignore)
Because he is unavailable, 
I don't really earn any of the chances to like or love him.
Even though he does has some feeling with me.

P/s: I like those words so much and I like him too 

He is my surprise or a gift from God who really cares for me.
Too bad he is unavailable. But I'm a bad girl.
I took risk to continue with him and I left someone who really loves me.
From my friends opinions, some says choose the younger one, some says dump both.
I'm very selfish and greedy girl! I love peoples around cares about me.
I would like to hold them both at the same time.

My little boy,
I choose you at last.
I like how you treat me like a princess.
I like how care for me and respect me.
But honestly I feel your hearts still with ... 
If someday you decide to do anything, please tell me...
I will respect your decision no matter how!
Now I try my best to love you and care for you
But I don't know how and what should I do?

Confusing

What a joke! 

It seem like my couple life season is on this month ...

Looking back for past two years, it is also June!

When I started my relationship with someone...

However, I always end it on July... (sad case)

I do not know how to manage a relationship...

When I was a kid... 

I want my life like a fairy tale story... Awww...

When I was a teenager...

I wan my life like TV love story drama... Hurmmm....

Now, I don't know what I want... Feeling lost!

I don't even know what I want...

I think I'm lonely? or desperate? or afraid?

Feeling guilty if I accepted you...

Because now u maybe is just a substitute of him...

And I'm sure now my decision is I want him...

But I don't know he also have the same feel with me?

For you I don't want to lose any chance...

If I accept you, I will not be play with ur heart...

At the same time, I feel sorry for him and him

The another him is I had a promise that is "I will wait for him looking me back"

Sorry and please give me some time...

Special video from Evelyn

谢谢你崇恩为我们做了一部slide
他的第一个作品，
我当场看了真的有感动，
想回很多我们在一起的回忆!

Special thanks to Evelyn Liow

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151555765962432&set=o.127839157288871&type=2&theater

（I couldn't download the video here, there is a link only =P)